Here are the 10 ways of dealing with your ex’s breakup in a dignified manner:
1 AN IOTA OF RESPECT
Yes, your ex has split up with his significant other. But it would be helpful for you to keep reminding yourself (yes, keep reminding yourself) that there was a time when you shared a cosy, unforgettable bond. So what if it ended badly? If you can keep an iota of respect for something you two once shared, it is half the battle won for you, even if you’re still somewhat bristling.
2 DON’T KISS AND TELL
Coming back to the earlier point, despite what his significant other is telling the entire world, you don’t have to follow suit.There is nothing tackier than sharing his infidelities, his perversions, what have you. At the end of the day, while the going was good, you were into it. So now that he’s going through a rough patch doesn’t make him easy prey for your vitriol. Watch your mouth.
3 CHOOSE YOUR FRIENDS WISELY
A true test of this moment is not whether he was wrong or your were right, but whether your friends truly care about you. Your real friends will not try to extract venom from you.Instead, they will be calm bystanders to the drama unfolding with him. There might be a good chance that they might even be friends with him -in which case, it is also a good test of their loyalty if they are indeed bit*hing him out to you. This is a time for maturity, not gossip
4 YOU STILL MISS HIM, AND IT’S PERFECTLY OK
Of course, you’ve made those 2am phone calls begging him to take you back. They fell on deaf ears. And now that he’s single, you might be missing him even more. It’s OK to miss him. It’s perfectly legitimate to be hopeful (please don’t act on it, it’s a chimera). As long as you are in touch with your emotions, and aren’t escalating them to delusional extremes, it is perfectly justified to get a bit sappy over a glass of wine. Alone.
5 DON’T DISS HIS EX
You might have done it before. You might have ranted about her. But this is not the time.He or she might have had their reasons for their split-up. But a vulnerable juncture in their innings (remember, it is `their’ innings) does not give you the right to start bit*hing out your ex’s ex. It’s just plain wrong. It reeks of smallmindedness. You are not that.
6 DO NOT RESORT TO SOCIAL MEDIA
An essay on . will make you look desperate.Twitter is worse because you have 140 characters to project your inarticulate and inappropriate self.Stick to posting songs, `liking’ updates from friends, that sort of thing.
7 IT’S RESPECTFUL TO CONNECT (BUT DON’T EXPECT A RE-DO)
In the event that your ex reaches out to you, do not ghost him. He was your significant other once. More importantly, meet over coffee and not drinks. You have no reason to be socially lubricated. Merely be empathetic.
8 DON’T TRY TO FIND OUT WHY
Even if you do end up meeting your ex (or his close friends) and despite the many theories floating around, it would be churlish (and hurtful to you) to find out why.What goes on inside a relationship is so opaque that you will never truly know what really happened.
9 IF YOU’RE STILL OBSESSED, YOU NEED HELP
In a strange way, your ex’s breakup could well be a wake-up call for you. Get yourself professional help if you’re still not over it.
10 THERE IS NO `SEE, I TOLD YOU SO’
Because re-starting the rant about how evil your ex was, is not only bitter, it’s stupid.