I used to think that happiness was a result of circumstances. However, I’ve learned that happiness is a choice. For me, that realization is a relief because it means I’m in control of whether or not I’m happy.
While relationships are meant to be happy, at times they are a good deal less than that. This is a list of things I’ve noticed that couples in super happy relationships do. Believe it or not, these are small changes but the difference in the level of your happiness can be enormous.
1. Use the word “we”
There’s no “I” in “relationship” or “marriage.” Wait, actually there is… But not metaphorically speaking. One of the great things about being in a relationship is becoming “one.” This means that his pain is your pain or her fears are your fears. And if one partner has a success you can say, “We did it!”
2. Walk side by side
Next time you’re out, pay attention to which couples are next to each other and when one partner walks ahead of the other. If you keep people watching, you’ll notice something about the temperature of these relationships. There’s an element of respect from the small act of choosing to walk next to your partner.
3. Brag about each other
They aren’t afraid to let other people know what a great person their partner is. In fact, they are proud of their spouse.
4. Make goals together
Super happy couples set goals on a weekly and yearly basis. They have direction in their life. These goals may be small things like “eat 3 vegetables a day” or “smile at everyone we see this week.” But they can also be bigger goals such as “save enough money to take a trip to Mexico” or “learn how to speak sign language.” Either way, setting goals helps these couples to be happy because they are progressing and supporting each other in their dreams.
5. Learn each other’s love languages
The best couples know how to express love to their partner in a way that their partner will recieve it. Even if you repeatedly tell your wife you love her and remind her how amazing she is, she might not be hearing it if her love language is physical touch. Super happy couples know how to communicate their love in a way their partner will feel it.
6. Buy ice cream
These couples find small services to do for each other like picking up a carton of peanut b*tter ice cream or throwing a towel in the dryer while the other is in the shower. Little acts of service make both the server and serve-ie happy.
7. Clean together
Doing menial tasks with someone you love transforms chores into parties. You’ll make memories jamming out to Disney songs while scrubbing the oven and cultivate an atmosphere for conversation that will both strengthen your relationship and make your life a little more sunny.
8. Share inside jokes
Super happy couples will hear a word that doesn’t mean much to the speaker but they’ll make eye contact and burst into fits of giggles. Cultivate jokes that are special to just the two of you.
9. Have traditions
Whether it’s Tuesday Taco Night or taking a bike ride the first Saturday of every month, super happy couples have things they can look forward to doing together without fail.
10. Go to bed at the same time
Even if one of them has to get up early to finish a project, happy couples choose to go to bed at the same time. Sharing a bed is a special part of your relationship and going to bed at the same time means being close physically as well as inviting pillow talk. It’s something small that can make an great difference.
11. Talk throughout the day
Super happy couples have each other on their mind. They can’t wait until evening to tell their partner about the banjo player chilling outside the library or getting 100% on a test. If nothing else, happy couples call to check on each other’s days during lunch or to square away evening plans.
It doesn’t matter if they’re married, super happy couples go on dates. That’s right, a pre-planned event where they spend time getting to know each other better. It can be a fancy dinner or something casual like going for a walk in the park. The important thing is spending quality one-on-one time together.
13. Tell the other they’re attractive
A person’s attractiveness is defined by everything from their looks to their fantastic qualities. Super happy couples often remind each other what things they find attractive.
14. Turn off their phones
Super happy couples spend at least a small part of their day tuned in to each other, and not their technology.
15. Set boundaries
Super happy couples don’t cross lines in their relationship because they’ve clearly defined where those lines are. They have mutual agreeance on what’s appropriate and what’s not with regards to friends of the opposite s*x, exes, and sexually explicit material.
16. Pray with each other (and for each other)
Super happy couples make God a part of their relationship. They know they need all the help they can get to make it work. Praying together creates unity and praying for the other promotes gratitude and charity.