I am a man of traditional values. Purity of physical relations has always been one of the things I desired in marriage. I myself did not get intimate with anyone prior to my marriage, even though I had plenty of opportunities and I was quite a desirable person.
Everything was rosy until my friends told me that the girl in question was in a relationship with a boy. I asked her about this and she denied. I did not want to hurt her or her family on the basis of a rumour, hence I decided to go ahead with the marriage. Ours has been a significantly unhappy marriage since day one. Having had children, years later one day she bared her past to me, which included quite an adventurous physical relationship with her boyfriend, including an abortion.
She opened up with an intention that I will walk out from her life, thereby bringing an end to an unhappy marriage. This revelation was something that I could not handle. But I did not walk away. I decided to stay on for the sake of our children as I want them to receive a full parental upbringing. An already bad marital relation has gone from bad to worse. Merely hanging by a thread.
When it comes to our children, we still work as a team and do best together. But deep inside I can not stay in this marriage. At a suitable point I want to get separated when it will no longer be detrimental to children. However, I do not want my children to know about her past because I do not know how they will react. Being people of modern times, they may be okay with it and I want them to be in that position. But a separation may bring it out in the open and that stops me from taking this step. At the same time, I cannot carry on. It tears my heart everyday. I don’t know what to do