“All men cheat.” You’ve probably heard people say this a lot, and who can blame them? With all the ‘men are trash’ stories you hear these days, you can be tempted to assume that being cheated on by your partner is a given.
Do all men cheat? No. This is simply based on the fact that nothing in the world is absolute. The statement is way too general to be true. So based on the rules of the universe alone, it’s safe to say that no, not all men cheat.
So why do we believe it?
For one thing, it has become a matter of self-preservation for many women to make statements like that. They go into relationships not expecting fidelity and that way they don’t get hurt. It’s sort of like locking your doors before you go to sleep at night. You probably wouldn’t get robbed. But it makes you feel safe and in control. It’s not about what the other person will do, it’s more about feeling protected.
Then there are those people who are already in relationships or marriages with cheaters. They have to say these things because admitting otherwise would make them feel like failures. “How can I believe there are faithful guys out there and still stay with this cheater?” they think. So they say all men do it and instantly feel better.
“It’s not my fault I’m staying. It’s the fault of the ‘men.’ I have no control. I am a victim.” Accepting that there aren’t cheaters out there scares them, because that means they would have to actually do something about their situation. They may have to get divorced, break up, see a counselor for their problems, etc.
Should all men cheat?
Some people say men can’t help themselves, they just have to cheat. Obviously, this is crap, because cheating is a choice. You don’t trip and fall into another woman’s vagina. You don’t have affairs while sleepwalking. These are conscious choices that people make, and just as he can choose to, he can also choose NOT to.
How to protect your relationship
Honestly, you can’t. A person who wants to cheat will cheat and there’s nothing you can do about it. But you can control some things. For example, don’t forgive a cheater and then be surprised that he does it again. Don’t pick partners who have no respect for you or the relationship. Be very clear that cheating is unacceptable.
Saying “all men cheat” is a coward’s way out. It comes from a place of fear. You’re not ‘woke’ or ‘tough,’ you’re afraid. It makes you lazy and makes you settle. Grab those big girl panties, get out there and find you a decent man. You deserve one. And they exist!
Featured Image via Giphy