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Guy Talk: Why Good Sex Is Not Enough To Keep A Man



Men like sex. A lot. No point saying it other than it is. On the bed, at the office, in the car (still a car virgin though), on the rooftop, in the bathr- You get the point.

But the thing is, contrary to popular beliefs, we don’t only think with our little heads and ignore all the promptings of the big head. The truth is, as much as the sex might be fifty shades of lit, men would rather be with someone they can have a conversation with (a lot of men would deny this though), someone who would make them want to be the best versions of themselves they can possibly be and someone who would listen to them and they would not always have to put up the macho façade all the time.

The truth about men is…

Men are human too. We hurt, we doubt, we second guess our every action, we feel disappointed, there are days we too want to curl up on the sofa with a tub of ice cream and watch ‘Me Before You’ nice movies. We too sometimes just want someone to hold us, hug us and tell us everything will be okay.

Valentine's Day 2face Annie Idibia Zumi

(Annie Idibia)

Unfortunately, partly because of societal expectations, partly because of the self diagnosed definition of what a man should be and how he should behave (have sexpertise, always be confident, be the shoulder to cry on and never need one yourself), a lot of the time, men bury the human sides of them and just live till they forget what it means to be alive.

This is why (I believe) men take longer to ‘mature’ than women because they more often than not, go through the ‘expected of a man’ phase for a bit, before they realize it’s all bulls**t and THEN take charge of their lives.

Sometimes it happens with time, sometimes it happens because a (wo)man made them realize they’d been sat in the passenger side of their lives all this time. This is also probably why they would say they love double Ds but end up with a woman that doesn’t even own a bra. Why? Because he found self-love through her. What am I trying to say? Yes women like a good rump in the hay, but we also like to be seen and treated as humans too. It IS the quickest way to our hearts.

But sexpertise is an added advantage too.

5 Signs Your New Man Will Be Good In Bed


Ladies, have you been with a man that you felt was starting to come alive but struggled with that realization (or relished it)? Share your experiences maybe?

Before you go, check out the . episode of “Guy Talk” on why many men don’t marry the women they love.


Cavey is a man, obviously. He’s also a mechanical engineer, a storyteller and a public speaker. You can follow him on Twitter @AsToldByCavey.

“Guy Talk” is a place where men help women understand the mind of a man a little better. To share ideas with us, send an email to [email protected].

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