My son was less than a month old when I split up with his father, who was really not keen about having a family. A year later, I met my husband and we got married.

We now have two children together. My son calls my husband ‘Dad’ and knows nothing about his biological father, who now lives abroad.

Now he’s getting older, I am beginning to worry that he needs to know the truth.

Do I tell him that the person he calls ‘Dad’ isn’t his real father, or do I say nothing and let him carry on thinking that my husband is his dad?

Doris by e-mail.

Dear Doris,

What happens if your boy’s father suddenly shows up from abroad and wants to see his son? I would tell him, but say that your husband is his dad in everything but

blood, the one who helps him with his homework and makes him feel better when he


Your boy will grow up to respect you more for being honest as it may be important

in the future for him to know the truth. The main thing is that there is trust

between you.


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